Ski Season Survival Guide

First things first, that movie Chalet Girl – Forget it. That is the best advice I can give you. You won’t make it through training if you keep looking for billionaire Ed Westwick.

Training- To be horridly honest with you, it’s detestable and grim and pretty much unpaid labour. It’s also really important. As sweet or as ass-ish those people in non-uniform are, remember they are your bosses. They talk about you behind your back, remember that. And even later, if everyone loves your boss and thinks they’re amazing, doesn’t mean you have to. I liked 1 out of 4 of mine. Training is also absolutely nothing like resort.

Resort living- Do not expect much from your staff accomm. I shared a potentially fatal bunk bed in a hallway, the stains in the bathroom were unmentionSKI Survival Guideable and French plumbing leave a lot to be desired and this was one of the best in the Alps. Make it homey, set up your speakers, stick some pictures on your wall and just face the fact that you’ll see your roommate/s naked, peeing whilst brushing their teeth and so hungover your eyes will burn. Embrace those moments.

The only truthful thing that Chalet Girl alludes to is the ‘Seasonal Shenanigans’. Some genius around Christmas will start erecting the sex web: Harry slept with Corrine, but the next night Corrine took home that Swedish barman and Harry got with Lucy, Lucy has already slept with Max and Eddie who share a room…you getting the picture? It gets complicated; you will become a notch on a bedpost, but don’t take it seriously or personally and don’t judge. They were probably drunk. (I’m aware I’m not painting the most wholesome picture, its not as bad as it sounds, I promise!) The advice part of this section was to hopefully scare all of you into being safe, don’t expect any privacy, double beds are a thing of the past, breaking into a chalet never ends well andnever, ever, sleep with guests and/or their offspring….well …except…

Mid Season- An interesting time for all; the excitement of snow and skiing almost every day has worn off, you’re tired, you’ve just checked your bank account and you’re wondering at what point you became a full time alcoholic. I have no remedy for this, taking a couple of naps is good but don’t waste your season. Skip a few nights out, (obvs not in a row) and embrace cheap living. Steal the almost-empty tubes of toilet roll from a chalet and whatever food you can get your hands on rather than paying for it. Find a supermarket or shop outside resort to stock up on other goods (10euro box of wine and other necessities) and have your season friend round for drinks rather than going out. Also, if you haven’t already, change your sheets you filthy shit.

Tidbits- Sleep with water at your side, you get drunk quicker at altitude, batteries deteriate quicker in the cold, don’t sleep with the heater on, call home, don’t have a coffee based diet, shower in chalets on changeover day, don’t get the blood wagon, uggs aren’t suitable footwear, don’t fuck up the linen order, you’re going to shit yourself on a bus going up those hairpins, enjoy.

Chalet Specific- Don’t judge your guests based on transfer day. They’ve probably been up as long as you have, and you’re ne-he-ver going to be in a viable state of mind to make judgements on a transfer day. Eating with them slows your night down, it’ll mean you get out later, but sometimes it’s worth it; getting to know your guests as people rather than customers and sitting down and eating a meal is more luxurious than you can imagine at times. Stealing is no longer illegal, it is encouraged. “Chalet Hands” hurt like a bitch, but you’ve got to keep scrubbing those toilets, (Blue Loo, Pink Sink, Green Cuisine) You’ll learn to suss out the good tippers, hate the lactose-intolerants and with any luck get in a rhythm with your chalet and make it to the slopes by 11:30…or your bed.

originally posted 21/11/2014

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UK Student and Lifestyle Blogger. Coffee Snob. Adventure Lover. Book Reader. Gilmore Girls Aficionado.

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