21 Things To Expect From Living in Uni Halls

Yeah so, I didn’t have a suitable header image for this post, so I just went with a cute one of Portsmouth, from a cute day when the sun was actually shining. By suitable, I mean remotely aesthetically pleasing, alas there is nothing aesthetically pleasing about the multitude of drunken/naked flat party/messy room photos I have accumulated over the year. There’s enough of that on the internet already. Anyway Uni Halls….

  1. One flatmates room will smell like death and failure.
  2. You become unresponsive to fire alarms.
  3. Drying your clothes in your room (who got £1.30 for a tumble dry?!) and never actually putting them away.
  4. Kitchen audits are the only time you clean the kitchen….or your parents are coming.
  5. Beer can castles/towers/forts/pyramids will remain for weeks after a flat party and are in fact the real holy grail.
  6. Exchange students are mental.
  7. Do not get emotionally attached to the lift, its a fickle little minx.
  8. Someone WILL have sex in the stairwell…and the laundry room…and the elevator/hallway…
  9. You’ll let leaflets that have been slipped under your door pile up for months.
  10. CAUTION: Awkward elevator conversation will take place.
  11. Passive aggressive fighting over fridge/freezer space will also take place.
  12. There is always an array of food delivery men outside halls and there is no shame in the sheer terror of going up to the wrong one.
  13. You will know exactly how long it takes you to get to each class. You will never leave a second before absolutely necessary.
  14. You get used to “We can’t employ you because you live in halls and can’t work when we want you to work. Sorry not sorry.”
  15. Somewhere in the building there is a class A knob that knocks all the ceiling tiles down once a week.
  16. There will be skanky underwear in the laundry room for months on end.
  17. Roasting more than Justin Beiber in the warmer months because NO FECKING WINDOWS OPEN.
  18. When you finally summon the motivation to wash up, you can’t because everyone else’s shit is stacked on top of yours and you are not touching Gretchen’s rank tuna.
  19. When you’re hungover as sin itself and your flat mates parents are about, you’ll know true suffering.
  20. The shittest hoovers known to man, they just rearrange the dirt around your room, if that.
  21. Post is the most exciting thing ever, and if your parents love you, (in my case god parent and best friends parents) care packages are even better.Who’s going to uni this september? anyone got anything else to add?

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UK Student and Lifestyle Blogger. Coffee Snob. Adventure Lover. Book Reader. Gilmore Girls Aficionado.

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